Disaster Movie ... Proves My Point

     WARNING:

     I have always said my sister was/is evil.

     Disaster Movie clearly states that August 29th IS the end of the world.

     My sister's birthday is August 29th.

     coincidence???? I think not.

     My sister IS evil and has brought and will bring much doom to this world.

                                                    RUN!!!

Road Trip

     Going on long road trips is not always fun. My family and I make a trip every year that lasts a week and it's only a 3 1/2 hour drive but it consists of a lot of nothingness. So to keep ourselves occupied, we made up a game.

     The animal game.

     We point out animals, and we get points for it. We play with farm animals. The most common animals found are worth less points and the rarer animals are worth more points. Scoring goes like this:

     pts.                              animal
      1.                                      cow
      2.                                   horse
      3.                                      pig
      4.                                   sheep
      5.                                    goat
      6.                                  chicken
      7.                            farmer on a tractor
      8.                                  Donkey

     The game is simple. You see cows you call out "cows." you would receive 1 point. You see sheep and you call out "sheep." You would receive 4 points and so on.

     You do this from where you see the first animals and continue till you get to your destination. You tally up the scores and whoever has more points in the end wins.

     Simple and easy :) Enjoy.

Need Money?

     Everyone needs a little money every now and then. The first thing that comes to mind is selling things. Let's have a yard sale, 20 tips to help your sale bring in more sales and be very productive:

     1. Pick the right date.
       -Near common paydays (1st & 15th)
       -Avoid holidays and holiday weekends
       -Avoid widely attended community events

     2. Shop your house for items to sell.
       Walk through every room.

     3. Give at least two weeks before the
       sale to pull and clean items.

     4. Arrange like items.
       -organize according to function
       (kitchen, clothing, books, music, etc

     5. Tag everything!

     6. Gear up. Be prepared: have ready a
       tape measure, yard stick, calculator,
       batteries, adn extension cords.

     7. Be an attention grabber. Make your
       signs BIG, BOLD, AND EASY TO READ.

     8. Signs should feature arrows. Place
       them at cross streets, grocery stores,
       and neighborhoods.

     9. List your sale multiple ways. Tell
       friends, internet and newspaper.

     10. Recruit helpers.

     11. Make carry out easy. Plenty of bags,
       rubber bands, and glass wrap.

     12. Make change. Have plenty of small
       bills and coins ready.

     13. Place large, eye-catching items close
       to the road.

     14. Group things as the are in a depart-
       ment store. (size, color, and usage.)

     15. Hang clothes. Avoid folding.

     16. Cover tables with colorful plastic.
       Avoid putting things on the ground.

     17. Display jewelry on fabric or a
       blanket. Anything valuable near the
       checkout.

     18. Use verticle space. Create levels on
       tables with boxes. etc.

     19. The art of display. Think like a
       store manager.

     20. Put baby clothes and toys towards the
       back of sale. These are the popular
       items so people will have to walk
       walk through the whole sale to get to
       these items.

  These are just a few tips I found that I thought would be a big help! I already do a lot of these but then I found more!

Watermelon Salad

Preperation time: 25 minutes. Chill 3 hours.

     Need:
       2 envelopes watermelon Jello.
       1 1/2 cups white grape juice.
       1 tsp. shredded lemon peel.
       1 1/2 cups assorted chopped fruit.
          (peaches, necterines, pears, grapes)
       1/3 cup crumbled feta cheese.

     Do:
       1. Prepare Jello as directed. Stir in
       grape juice and lemon peel.
       2. Transfer 1/2 into a baking pan. Add
       fruit. Refrigerate for 1 1/2 hours.
       Spoon in remaining juice. cover and
       chill again for 1 1/2 hours.
       3. Top with feta before serving.

Flat Tire

     Not the alcoholic beverage.

     Brother. All I will say about my brother is that he has his moments. the other night my brother decided getting drunk would be fun. Usually this is true, but not for him last night.

     I got a phone call this afternoon from my brother saying he needed my help.

     The story I got before I showed up was "It's a long story and I don't know how." He told me he needed a tire iron, a jack, and a spare tire.

     Sounds like nothing out of the ordinary, just a flat tire. No. Not this time.

     This is what I saw when I got there.

     How on earth he thought he could tell me this was a "flat" tire I don't know. It was nothing but shreds.

     Alcohol was definitely involved and God knows what else.

Livin' In Sin?

     Over the past weekend I was told that I was living in sin. Just because I live with boyfriend. This is bullshit.

     To the people who criticized me, yes, I live with my boyfriend. No, I don't give a damn what you think. You think you and your kids are better than me but yet ...

     I have NEVER tried a drug in my life. Your kid is an addict. (piss off)

     I do not have any kids out of wed-lock. (not a single mother) Your kid is taking advantage of a dead man to get money from the government. (piss off)

     I do not drink accessively. You are an alcoholic. And so are your kids. (piss off)


     I am NOT a stripper. (piss off)

     I am NOT a prostitute. (piss off)

     I am NOT 30 years old and living with my parents. Your kid has been and has been stealing your shit and selling it for drugs.
(piss off)
    
     I have never been in jail. For anything. Your kids have, some of them numerous times. (piss off)


     I also know that some of your kids live with their "significant other" and you seem to have no problem with this. (PISS OFF)

     I am a full time student ... in college ... almost graduated. You did not graduate college or attend and Your kid is not even close. (piss off)


     So to those of you who think you are "better" than me ... piss off. I have done more than you can or ever will attempt. You are at a dead-end as to where I am just beginning.

Ithaa Underwater Restaurant

     The place to be: Ithaa Underwater Restaurant.

     It is predictively expensive and has excellent choice entrees. But it is an remarkable experience you can't miss.

     The restaurant is located on the Rangali Island found in the collection of the Maldives Islands just South/West of India. 

     You are lowered 4 meters underwater via elevator and walk in to an exquisite diner. This is where you are looked in on by passing aquatic life. It's a dine-in-aquarium and it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

     It is a beautiful place to visit and definately a must-see.

What Time IS It?

     Sometimes, this is exactly what I feel like:

     Piss off world  :)

God's Gift to ManKind

     Skittles.
          Yes ... Skittles. They're sweet and chewy and perfect bite size pieces. All the pretty colors just like the rainbow. All the flavors of yummy goodness. 

Red, represent the heart of Skittles. The bleeding love everyone has for them.


Orange, represent the crazy side of Skittles. Why everyone goes a little nuts for them.
        

Yellow, represent the warm tender feeling you get when you eat Skittles.
               

Green, represent the personality of Skittles. Everyone gets a little confidence when eating them.

                                                       

                                                              

Purple, represent the self satisfication of Skittles. You are to the perfect level of full-ness.

                                                                                                                          



The rainbow, represents the joyous feeling of Skittles. They make people happy and set their endorphins free!

How I'm Trying To Better Myself

1. Bought a pedometer. Going to walk/run/jog 30 minutes a day at least 3 times a week. This will boost my metabolism. (Don't really think I could, recently had an over active thyroid.)

2. Limit my sugar intake because it promotes weight gain with empty calories.

3. Add fiber to my diet. Such as fruits and veggies and wheat bread. This will help keep my digestive system healthy and running properly.

4. Keep Dairy intake at a minimum.

5. Perform proper crunches at least 3 times a week. Avoid sit-ups, they do very little for my tummy and give you aches and pains.

6. Drink plenty of water. 6-8 glasses a day.

7. Stop eating within 3 hours of bedtime.

8. Eat 6 smaller meals more instead of 2-3 big meals per day. this kicks up my metabolism.

9. Eat a decent breakfast everyday. This will give my body the nutrients it needs to start the day off right.

Dear Cell Phone,

You're CRAP.


           Love,

               your Master.

Dear Internet,

     I'm not trying to kill you. I know I ask a lot of you, for you to run more than one program at a time. Playing videos, listening to music, blogging, facebook, and googling but do you really have to piss me off and go as slow as possible?

     I am paying for high speed internet but you seem to like to play dial up a lot. We need to work together if one day we plan to be friends til the end.

     I don't want to hurt you or cause you stress but please... please... try not to act like I'm killing you. I love you.

Dream Number 1

     Last night I had another "death" dream. I was in a building being held hostage by Two grown men. They had kept me up on a loft with no way down except to plummet to my death.

     These two men had no faces and no names, which for my dreams is NOT unusual. As I was stuck up on the loft I had ventured around looking for an alterior way down. I was moving boxes, trying to dig holes, and scratching through the walls. Nothing seemed to be working.

     I did notice that when I moved one box that there was a hole. A hole that seemed to be dug underground. (Some how the building I was kept in was underground with a loft and this hole led to a different building underground.) So I followed this hole and it led to the place where they were doing there dirty work.

     I had no idea what their dirty work was, my dream never gave details. Most likely drugs or something illegal. So I kept going back and forth between the buildings trying to find out what was going on and trying not to get caught missing.

     When I returned to the loft where I had been left I looked over the edge and saw someone climbing a ladder to come find me. This person was trying to beat me up and tie me up. I retreated back through my built in hole in my box and tried to get away. He saw what I had been doing so I blocked his way in so he couldn't follow me.

     After I got courage to come back because there was no escape through the hole I climbed back to the loft. I stood up and it was very quiet. Suspicious I thought. So I tried to go back through my hole and suddenly someone grabbed my feet and pulled me out.

     They tied me up and sat me down. They took two clamps (hooked to a power source) and clamped one to my collar bone and one to my chin. This started electrocuting me instantly. Then they took this gun type thing and stuck a metal pin in it. They shot this "pin" into my neck right in front. This was making it extremely difficult to breathe. Just before I had died in my dream, I woke up and a little scared I woke up boyfriend for comfort.
    
     boyfriend thinks the idea in my dream was creative and even gave advice on how it would be better. :( not cool. So not cool.

Thing in My Shoe

     I went to the mall today. Nothing out of the ordinary, I was going shopping for a dress for my sisters 8Th grade graduation.
    
     I have never gone "dress shopping" before so this was an adventure for sure.
    
     After I got home I brought my bags in from my truck and I unpacked my bags inside the house. I looked down at my foot and I saw something black sticking out from the side of my shoe.
     I turned my foot upside down to get a better look and this unidentified object and I see it's actually stuck IN my shoe. So I start pulling ... and pulling ... and pulling.

     This is what I found after I pulled it all out. :)

     A 1 1/2" screw. I have no idea where the hell I picked this up from. Thank god my sandals were thick enough for this not to go through and stick my in the foot.

     To give you an idea of the size:

     Doesn't look big in this picture but when it's in your shoe ... could've been your foot... It's HUGE. :)

From one extreme to another

     Living in Nebraska all my life I've learned a few things. We have Chimney Rock, corn, Carhenge, corn, the Henry Doorly Zoo, corn, COLLEGE WORLD SERIES, corn, and extreme weather changes ... oh, and corn. A week in Nebraska would give most people a reason NOT to live here. Not just anyone will make it through the rapid climate changes. A simple week in Nebraska can look like this.

     Sunday:

     Monday:

     Tuesday:

     Wednesday:

     Thursday:

     Friday:

     Saturday:

     You may think this is an over exaggeration but it's not. You can ask anyone who has lived in Nebraska or someone who has even driven through this marvelous state.

     I just thank God we don't have hurricanes or earth quakes. At least I've never felt one or been through one. I've been surviving in this state for 23 years. :)

My first Sushi

     Coming from a person who has caught fish, filleted them, cooked them, and eaten them, sushi is not the way to go. I tried sushi because it's on my bucket list and my friends were begging me. So we went to the restaurant and we got several different kinds. We got raw sushi, non fish sushi, and cooked sushi??? Cooked sushi makes no sense to me but what ever. This is what was set in front of me.

     This ... is what I saw ...

     Seriously if you have ever gone fishing you know that there is something wrong here.

     First, someone has to catch the fish. 

     Second, someone has to fillet or chop up the fish:

      Third, someone has to prepare the fish: (notice how I said prepare. NOT cook.)



     This may look fantastically wonderful to you but not to me. This should be breaded and fried. Also note that if this is not prepared correctly there is a chance of food poisoning or death just like any other food but more likely.

     There is also other organisms you can put in your sushi:

     This is appetizing? Hell no. This is gross. I've had calamari but it was fried and that was great. Eating raw things from the ocean, lake or river should be illegal. If these were properly cooked it would be a different story. It would be yummy.But NOT RAW.

Irritating Holes

     So, before boyfriend and I moved into our new house we were told that there was a hole in the ceiling. We were also told that it would be fixed before we moved in. They came the day before we moved in to fix this non damaging hole, what they actually did was bring in a piece of dry wall and set it on the fire place.

     This seems a little counter preductive hm? Well, we moved in the next day and the hole was still not fixed, obviously. We didn't think anything of it at the time because it was a meaningless hole. In the next couple of nights it started pouring rain. Not the light stuff, I mean winds like 30-40 miles an hour sideways rain and hail.

     Boyfriend and I were watching a movie when he looks over in my direction and gave me "the look". This was the look of "I hear running dripping water ... inside the house." F. M. L. From this non problematic hole is a stream of water running down the fireplace and, onto the mantel and going all over the electronics we had set up. This includes the 46" LCD TV, the speakers, wires, PS3, and dvd player.

     So we run around fixing the problem and we emailed the house guy and bitched him out. The next day the people came to "fix" this hole for the second time. They repaired the tiling on the roof and fixed where it had actually been leaking from. At least when it rains now nothing will get wet and we can put all our shit back. Ugh!

Reasons Not to Procreate

     For selfish people like myself, I have numerous reasons why I refuse to breed. I'm sure kids are great and the experience is amazing, or so I've been told, kids are trouble.

Let's start with the most obvious shall we:

     1. PREGNANCY. Who actually wants to bear a child in them for a minimum of nine months?? Being pregnant may be a beautiful thing for some people but from what I hear ... The baby likes to squish bladders and kick a lot. Also, Morning sickness. I don't know about you but I'd prefer not to throw up almost every day if I didn't have to. I know it only last a while but still. I've also heard that people have strict diets because some things might harm the baby or things that you once loved will make you sicker than a dog. In my opinion, those foods are not worth giving up.

     2. GETTING FAT. You are carrying this thing for nine months ... it makes you FAT. Have you heard of stretch marks? Well you'll see them soon enough when you start showing that gastly baby bump. Not to mention your feet swell up and become enormous and everything aches. You have to buy new clothes because nothing fits anymore, which gets expensive.

Is this what you WANT to look like? Me - HELL no! This is NOT attractive.

     3. CHILD BIRTH. Who in their right mind WANTS to have an object at least the size of a bowling ball coming out a hole the size of a ping pong ball?? Can you say ouch and a few other choice words? No wonder women start screaming and yelling "I hate you" and "Why did you do this to me?" and other obscenities. I be pissed and stressed out too. And if you can't have vaginal birth you have to go with option B: a caesarean section. They literally have to cut you open to get this thing out of you. Thanks, but no thanks.

     4. After the child is removed from you: clean up, relaxation, and crying. The baby is pissed because it has to do its own thing now, no longer mooching off mommy's good stuff. (not including breast feeding.)

     5. BREAST FEEDING. Do you really want this thing sucking on your nipple almost all the time. It's a nice feeling, but only for certain reasons. Nipples get big, sensitive, and sore. Sensitive to the point where they don't want to be touched. Where is the fun in that?

     6. MONEY. You will notice your money goes a lot faster when there is a kid involved. It needs food, it needs drink (if not breast feeding and even after.) it needs toys and it needs clothes. And the faster they grow the faster they will need more clothes and food and toys. This is plus what you already spend on yourself.

     7. INFANCY. Crying, whining, peeing, pooping, eating, sucking, and sleeping. That is it. They sleep (rarely), they whine almost constantly, they cry when the whining isn't resolved, they pee and poop constantly all day long, and they eat and eat and eat.

     8. TODDLER YEARS. The still whine when they don't get their way. They start to talk and walk and you have to go through potty training. And soon they start school, there goes more of your money...

     9. KID YEARS. Kids are trouble. They don't listen, they like to break things and color on everything they KNOW they shouldn't. And now a days it's "illegal" or "wrong" to punish your kids. I say bullshit. I got the belt, the paddle, the wooden spoon, and other things and I turned out pretty damn well.

     10. TEEN YEARS. oh. my. god. This is what all parents are afraid of. Puberty. It's different between genders but still a pain in the ass. They start eating more, thinking about the opposite sex, getting acne, worried about peers, develope emotions and "feelings." This is also the rebel stage of the childs life. You think they didn't listen before ... hahahaha ... just you wait.

Point is, is that you have to take care of this thing for and LEAST 18 years (or more) it just depends. In my opinion all this torture and self mutilation ... not worth it. Or I might just be extremely selfish. I haven't figured that one out yet.

Why the "Hard Stuff" is always better

      Seriously. Think. Hard stuff is better than not hard stuff. such as:


Hard candy vs. Not hard candy -
     If you don't bite it or break it, you can suck on that shit forever! I mean it can last at least 10-15-20 minutes depending on how devoted you are to making it disappear. Other candy like gummies, m&ms, skittles, kit kat, or whatever only lasts seconds then it's gone for good. So, quick easy yummy taste or long lasting pleasureful taste...


Hard liquor vs. beer (or non hard liquor) -
     It takes waaaaaay more beer to get you drunk than it does the hard stuff. Unless you seriously are a light weight. Two shots of everclear and you might be hulicinating, two cans of beers and you may .... not feel anything. I don't know about you but if I want that quick buzz.... the hard stuff is the way to go.


Hard Penis vs. non hard penis -
     One thing that a lot of people are afraid to talk about. Well, I'm not. It seriously is better to have a hard penis than a limp penis and every woman in this world will agree. (this includes gays and women who are not lesbians. I have nothing against any gender and which gender they are interested in. This is not supposed to be offensive.) Face it, you CANNOT have sex with a non HARD penis.


Hard evidence vs. no evidence (or little evidence) -
     Hard evidence is garunteed evidence. It is literal proof against the bad guys. Like fingerprints and DNA, its rather difficult to "fake" these. little evidence could possibly not be evidence at all or it could be the work of a frame artist.


Hard tops vs. convertibles -
     I don't care what you say, when you are in a convertible, if you are a female especially, your hair will blow in your face. No this does not hurt but it's annoying as hell and your hair will be all "frizzy." And with hard tops you will never ever make the mistake of leaving your roof down in the rain. EVER.

Moving Day

     Boyfriend is seperating from the military. Needless to say boyfriend and I had to move. We found a nice house and scheduled moving dates and so on. One day people came to pack up our stuff. It only took them several hours. FOR TWO PEOPLE. It was an amazing system they had. They next day people came to load the stuff and unload the stuff. Again, several hours. After we relaxed and ate some food we started putting things away and unpacking, boxes upon boxes. I was so excited to get things put away and making everything look good and comfy and looking like a real home. :) I love boyfriend.
     As all people, when they move, hope they have nice neighbors. Not obnoxious or real party hardies, or secretive, or creepy, etc. We hadn't met any yet because we were all inside unpacking and stuff. We as in boyfriend, me, and our roomate Aaron. Obviously we took the master bedroom :) and Aaron took the spacious room downstairs on the opposite side of the house. This made him happy. But it gave us a spare bedroom upstairs, so now it's the ORANGE AND BLACK room. And I'm not kidding.
     Later on as I went to my truck to get some things out that we had put in there to transfer to the new house I walked outside and the neighbor across the street yells out "Hey nice tits!" SERIOUSLY, my first day here, not even unpacked or anything and this creep decides to piss me off first chance. Not only was a not wearing a shirt that showed cleavage and not a mid-drift, this accusation made no sense. Most girls would take this as a compliment and respond nicely. Not me, I'm not that girl. I am a bitch at heart. Boyfriend knows this that's why he likes me.
     Not only did I not respond or even acknowledge his existence, I walked inside like nothing happened and went to tell the boyfriend. Of course he was upset too, having people cat call to his girlfriend and such. A couple days later boyfriend went to go talk to the father figure of the house, finding out it was a girl who said it in the first place. Now, I'm NOT a lesbian and I really don't care if you are, just don't dish it out on me. Either way the father figure apologized and said it wouldn't happen again. We'll just see abou that.

My First Drunk Experience

     It was the day of my 22nd Birthday and I had never been drunk before. I know 22 and never been drunk... what the hell right? Well I didn't even drink til I was 21. And I'm talking about the stage just before wasted and just after buzzed. I still remember most of the night but not ALL of it. This came as a surprise to me the next morning.

     My friends begged me to have my party at the club we always went to downtown. So, I made plans for it to be at this club that they were desperately begging for. At the time it was 3 of my girlfriends, brother, and boyfriend of 4 years. (not anymore) We were all having a good time, brother kept buying my shots and drinks, it was great. This was also the night I found that my body does NOT like Bacardi. Sad day. Anywho it was getting close to closing time so we all headed outside.

     This is the part I DON'T remember, standing out on the curb getting ready to walk to the truck. Brother tells me a girl walked by behind us bitching and whining about her boyfriend and I wasn't having it. He said I turned around and just let her have it. I was following her and scolding her all the way inside the building. How she was ruining my night, that I didn't come out to here her bitch, and she was ruining my fantastic eveing and ruining my birthday and so on. Again, I don't remember this. He said that I was in her face inside the building and I got so loud and verbally abusive that her boyfriend stepped in and punched me. Fucking punched me. This was obviously not a fight between him and I, let alone him being involved at all. This enraged me more.

      I was told that he was escorted out by two policemen and put in a cop car. hahaha ... dick. So we went back outside and walked to our trucks. My Boyfriend at the time drove me to his house and brother followed. When we arrived they both carried my inside. On the way up the stairs I noticed something to my left and apparently asked what it was. They told me it was a raccoon and that it would eat me and infect me with rabies if I didn't get inside. They told me they were shocked when I started freaking out and screaming. DUH! So when we were inside I remember asking the boyfriend if I could sit down... he said yes and all I remember is just hitting the floor. face first. 

      I woke up in my boyfriends bed, naked. Don't really know how it happened but that wasn't important. My boyfriend relayed the story to me and I was so embarassed. But I love to laugh at myself so I thought it was hilarious. As I was walking out of my boyfriends house I looked to my right and realized what they told me was a viscious raccoon was really a bird house. I am a moron when intoxicated. I laughed and we went to go get breakfast and continue talking about the previous night.